The Mr. Fixit Hat

Darling husbands out there, this post is for you! There is a trick you need to know…it can just be our little secret if you like, but I promise you, learning this trick will make your life so much easier! Oh I know, we women seem so hard to understand at times, and often ‘never satisfied’…but that is mostly because you don’t know the trick yet…are you ready? Here it is…do not put on the Mr. Fixit Hat unless requested!!

This is so easy! When your wife talks about her day, or a certain situation in her life, most of the time she is just hungry for someone to listen! You see, we women are amazing creatures! We come to conclusions by accident really, because we speak things until they resolve out there in the air. You genius men usually think first, then speak… a waste of time in our book, but that is part of the fabulous variety and attraction between us; so we better get used to it.

Here’s the deal. When your lady is telling you her feelings, or the events most current on her fertile mind, and you offer a solution, that is like throwing cold water on her process of understanding. Your well intentioned ‘suggestions’ invalidate her as a person. It is like saying, “Stop! You cannot figure out anything without me, so don’t even try!” Conversation stoppers; that is what sweet Mr. Fixits offer, and they don’t even mean to cause a problem; they are just trying to help…the trick is to know when she needs help and when she just needs to talk it out into the air.

Hubby and I have a little code we use for this now. He will ask if he needs to get his Mr. Fixit hat for this conversation. I can say yes or no. Most of the time I just want him to listen, then carry on a regular conversation. It is still a challenge to communicate between the sexes however, but this little trick has helped us.

The next hurdle is body language! Men! Listen to me on this! When your wife starts to share something with you, and you look out the window, check your phone, or close your eyes and yawn…peace and harmony have just vacated your home! Be Careful! We are watching! Eye contact, active listening, a carefully placed nod and even just a grunt of understanding will do wonders. We will be done soon.

Some of the air has to come out of the balloon before more can be added. Just give us your attention for a little bit. I promise, there will be plenty of dragons to slay, and plenty of things to ‘fix’ as we travel this road together, but we ladies need your ears sometimes so we can let some of the air out of our balloons to make room for your strong wisdom and leadership.

When we need something fixed, we can hand you the hat.

Two Days

Greetings this fine October morning! It has been way too long since I posted. There is a concept I will develop as time allows. There are only two days that matter! This day, and that day. Today and the day Jesus shouts and the trumpet sounds. Only those two days matter at all!
Sufficient for the day is the evil thereof…that’s what the Word says…Now is the accepted time, today is the day of salvation…it says that as well.

All through the Bible God points us to the present! Now faith…Today if you will hear his voice…Give us this day, our daily bread…over and over when we really read His Word, we see his will for us is to live in the present moment. Make the best of our NOW, and let the past go and the future rest in his care.

We must be ready for the trumpet and we stay ready by using each and every ‘today’ to its fullest potential. What can I do this day to fulfill the present command? How can I best use this day to further the Kingdom of God? Start with prayer, proceed with gratitude, walk in love.

Hey, we can do anything when we know there is a close to it. In 24 hours there will be another day (maybe) that I will need to fill with His will for my life, so today, just do it! Be ready and listen for the trumpet, stay prayed through and forgiving others with all our hearts, and treasure each breath.

One way to apply this principle is to focus on the items within your field of vision and mentally name them. Really, give it a try. This practice pulls you right out of the mental gymnastics of what should have been and what it this and that happens. Listen, name the sounds you hear. Focusing on the exact items and events in each moment brings a peace and an acceptance of self and others that really opens us up to the Spirit of God and His leading. Try it. Happy Today!

New Book Now Available

My new book has just been published! To find out more about the book, please click on the link to the top right. It is titled “I Always Feel So Righteous When I Eat a Spinach Salad” There will be a way to purchase the book on the book detail page as soon as it is available for sale. 🙂 Happy September out there!

There is a way…

The Bible tells us that ‘there is a way that seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death’ (Proverbs 16:25). So what’s a body to do? If my way seems right, how do I know, how can I be sure it is not the way of death?

Most would say, ‘just listen to your heart…go with your gut, etc.’ Yet, if I stay in The Word, look what comes up: ‘The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?’ (Jeremiah 17:9) So much for that.

Then HOW can I know the way that seems right is right? God doesn’t have skin on anymore. He doesn’t actually hold my hand and lead me clearly forward just because I will him to. There is a fair amount of effort expended to assure this feeble soul that the ways that seem right to me are indeed the will of The Most High. Sometimes the ‘way’ is made clear by what happens immediately following the decision to turn this way or that.

A friend of mine recently turned down a path they convinced themselves was safe, only to suffer an auto accident. It was a miracle accident, you know the kind, minor injuries only in what could have been far worse, and the hand of God was clearly seen both in protection, and correction.

A speedy retracing of the path showed the other option to be the will of God instead. The suffering encountered because of the error is nonetheless painful, and precious time has been wasted. Nevertheless, God patiently teaches us lessons, and we patiently endure, hopefully the wiser for the chastisement. How do we avoid these errors? What will it take for us to finally ‘learn from our mistakes’ and always choose the way that not only seems right, but also is right?

‘Hey, just pray about it, already! Ask God to show you, and believe that he will; and as your faith is, so be it unto you.’ This simple advice has been given and received so many times! I believe that, you know. And that is what most of us do whenever we come to a place along life’s road where the ways divide and direction decisions must be made. We go to God in prayer. He is so faithful, he does answer each and every prayer we utter (assuming our sin has not separated us from him and from hearing his voice), and most of the time his Word is a lamp unto our feet and a Light unto our path so our steps are sure and progress, growth, and success result. It is all about prayer.

Fall on your knees, open the Good Book, and submit to the depth of relationship Jesus calls us to. The enemy and our flesh fight hard to take the hours away so prayer time remains shallow and sporatic. Fight back! One of the weapons we can use in this fight is the off button! Think about this:

Just what will we miss if we don’t log on to Facebook every day? What will happen if that text message isn’t read for a day or two? Will the person die? Will we? Probably not. There is scientific evidence now that shows how technology has actually shortened attention spans and reduced our ability to compute mentally and complete thoughts and projects. The constant interruption and electrical impulses confuse our brains and reduce us to mind-numbed robots; slaves to the little instrument we so lovingly cradle in our palm. One old Hopi Elder said it this way, ‘the communication with God is hindered by these instruments. You can no longer hear his voice, and the intuition shuts down.’

There is a way that seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death…hmmm. Let’s use the off button more and turn our hearts to Jesus and His Word so our steps are indeed ordered of The Lord. Thanks for reading. Pray on.